Friday, March 14, 2014

Hoof in Mouth

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In official testimony on Wednesday, HHS Secretary Kathleen Sebelius declared uncategorically that there would be no more delays in Obamacare's implementation, the enforcement of the individual mandate, or any other extensions or adjustments to the nation's biggest, worst-conceived, and most incomprehensible law.

And she may actually be telling the truth, because Obama already made a flying buttload of new changes, extensions and adjustments during the 48 hours before Sebelius made her promise.

With a sweep of his mighty pen, the president backed off until 2016 the amount of time that people can keep their old, substandard, "worse than no insurance" healthcare plans. He then issued another directive saying that for the millions who were tossed from their old healthcare plans due to Obamacare, he was dropping the mandate to get new insurance or pay a fine. In other words, he made a presidential declaration that going from having insurance to having no insurance is okey-dokey in his book!

And as long as his pen still had ink in it, Barry signed an edict somehow magically exempting parts of Obamacare from the sequester cuts which are the law of the land (or were, back when laws actually meant something).

But apart from the fact that Obamacare is now completely without structural integrity of any discernible nature, how is the program doing overall?

Well, according to statistics which Hope n' Change doesn't feel like looking up again, there have been about 4 million "enrollees" to Obamacare, although "enrollee" doesn't actually mean anything, since Sebelius testified that she has no frickin' idea how many people have actually paid for a plan - and moreover, she doesn't appear to care. Estimates are that about 1 in 4 of the (ahem) "enrollees" haven't paid a dime, and have thus not truly enrolled in doodly squat.

And speaking of 1 in 4 (smooth segue, huh?) that also seems to be the number of enrollees who were uninsured when this whole debacle started. That means 75% of Obamacare customers already had insurance, but were willing to change plans when they figured out that other people would be picking up most of the cost.

None of this, of course, was mentioned when B. Hussein appeared on the hip, cool, youth-oriented "Between Two Ferns" comedy webcast, where he was interviewed about Obamacare by alleged actor Zach Galifianakis and proved to be about as funny as crib death.

In other words, this week in Obamacare was pretty much like every other week since the program's inception. A complete disaster.

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The ill-fated sketch appeared on "Funny or Die." Sadly, the title is only rhetorical.

Wednesday, March 12, 2014

Malaysia Mystery

Hope n' Change isn't really interested in politics today.  The mystery of what happened to Malaysia Flight 370 and its 239 passengers is all we can really think of.

It was bad enough to think that something catastrophic but accidental happened in mid-air. But as of this writing, it now sounds like someone in the cockpit shut off the transponders, turned the jet in a new direction, and then plunged it to an altitude at which it could fly to an unknown fate without being detected on radar.

If true, this is evil of a truly breathtaking nature.

Speculation on our part would be pointless until more and better information comes in. For now, we're keeping the passengers, crew, and their families in our thoughts. And additionally hoping that if this has been an act of terrorism, that there will be swift and dramatic consequences.

Monday, March 10, 2014

Spring Forward, Fall Over

Readers- Okay, we could have just said that we despise Daylight Savings Time because it throws off our circadian rhythms for weeks (trivia note: Circadian Rhythm was also the official name of Lawrence Welk's orchestra!) and used that as an excuse for not posting anything today.

But Hope n' Change is made of sterner stuff, and so we decided we'd at least post a big, colorful picture of Barack Obama making his "derp" face. You're welcome!

We are now going to pour some coffee, some "coffee," or some coffee with "coffee" in it, and change the time on every one of our frickin' clocks while yawning and muttering under our breath.