Friday, July 10, 2015

Dereliction of Dooty

obama, obama jokes, political, humor, cartoon, conservative, hope n' change, hope and change, stilton jarlsberg, troops, supreme court, sex change, gender, immigration, white people, confederate flag, AFFH
 You can rum, but you can't hide.

If Hope n' Change wasn't on the last day of our imaginary vacation, we'd certainly be commenting on one or more of the issues mentioned above. Probably in language which would frighten men, make women faint, and turn livestock barren.

And if we weren't enjoying a well deserved day off, we might write an entire editorial about how a lot of seemingly unrelated recent news stories all seem to be pieces of the same big puzzle. One that, when assembled, paints a pretty frightening picture for America's future.

What are those puzzle pieces? Obama's plan to "Affirmatively Further Fair Housing" by making sure that no neighborhood contains only people who can afford to live there.  His wide open border policy, his support of sanctuary cities, and his propensity to distribute both criminal and medically dangerous individuals throughout the nation.

Other pieces of the puzzle: muzzling free speech with all of the foolishness about the confederate flag, denigrating white people and American history, and not only fining but putting gag orders on bakers who choose to incorporate their religious beliefs in their livelihoods.

But there's more! Consider that the Supreme Court essentially declared that states' rights are meaningless with their ruling on gay marriage (and also eroded the entire legal concept of marriage), and then upped the ante by declaring in their Obamacare ruling that the very concept of "state" is now meaningless. And let's not forget that this same Supreme Court then ruled that federal voter registration forms must be accepted by the states, even though they don't require the applicants to prove - or even declare - citizenship.

We'd also look at the public ending of fixed gender identity ("gender neutral" bathrooms have recently been added to the White House), replacing parents with government on little matters like removing or altering the genitalia of children, and Obamacare not only making healthcare less affordable but encouraging people to consider end of life options which are (less than coincidentally) the cheapest for Washington's bean counters.

When you put all those pieces together, or "connect the dots" as the Democrats used to say when Bush was in office, you see the entire fabric of American society being rapidly and deliberately unraveled by orders and edicts.

Anyway, that's what we'd say if we weren't on vacation.

PS: We totally suck at taking time off...

Wednesday, July 8, 2015

Time Off From Bad Behavior

Hope n' Change is taking Wednesday and Friday off this week to enjoy a "staycation" and attend to various boring (but refreshingly nonpolitical) chores here at the office complex. There are desks to clean, whiskey bottles to put in the recycling bin, and checks from the Koch brothers to deposit.

Of course, if the world does something even crazier than usual we'll jump back into the hotseat. Although considering the rampant insanity which has become the norm, that's setting the bar pretty high. Currently, the plan is for our next cartoon and commentary to be on Monday, July 13, assuming that the jute mill don't explode...

obama, obama jokes, political, humor, cartoon, conservative, hope n' change, hope and change, stilton jarlsberg, pogo, jute mill, exploded
By the way, the Pogo strip above is over 60 years old but brilliantly captures both the volatility and unreliability of what goes on when people react to alleged "news" these days.  It's a funny but profound reminder that we'd all do well to sort out which issues du jour are actually important and which are imaginary exploding jute mills.

With that in mind, the comments section will remain open for whatever free-for-all discussions people want to have over the next few days. See you there!

Monday, July 6, 2015

Day of Rectuming

obama, obama jokes, political, humor, cartoon, conservative, hope n' change, hope and change, stilton jarlsberg, malia, lena dunham, hbo, girls, analingus

As if we needed another reminder that our national culture has literally gone down the crapper, it was revealed this week that first daughter Malia Obama has taken work as a summer intern on Lena Dunham's screamingly liberal, graphically sexual HBO series "Girls" - which infamously featured an onscreen act of analingus.

By the way, analingus should not be confused with Aer Lingus, which is a lovely Irish jet service which you can enjoy without chugging a bottle of Listerine afterwards.

The scene in question "starred" (boy, has that word lost all meaning) alleged actress Allison Williams, who is the daughter of disgraced former NBC news anchor Brian Williams. Which, we're pretty sure, amounts to some kind of liberal media incest which is probably described with a word ending in "lingus."

We don't really blame young Ms. Obama for wanting to pursue a career in show business like her father, but out of respect for the American people and our national image abroad we wish her parents might have encouraged her to find work on a show which fewer people find offensive.

Say, The Dukes of Hazzard.

Don't panic. It's just a donut.